My Personal History with Sex Toys
At the age of eighteen, I received my first vibrator from my then boyfriend. It was love at first sight. Yes, I had also fallen in love with my then boyfriend at first sight, but I was quickly enamored with the vibrator he gifted me. If I remember correctly, I soon after got my second toy, and I’ve never looked back. Here’s a short history of how Liz developed her current obsession with everything sex-toy related.
As a teenager, I was exploring my likes and dislikes regarding my sexual tastes. I chatted online for hours and scoured the web for information. Mind you, this was the nineties, so there wasn’t much Internet available. There were no social media and the blogging community yet had to arise. I was basically left to my own devices. So I chatted, I watched images that I found arousing, and I read erotic stories. But then what?
I knew how to get myself excited. After uncovering my love for BDSM, I knew that made me feel good. I just didn’t know how to direct this energy. I could not masturbate. I’ve tried it. I’ve tried it with my fingers, I’ve tried it with objects, but nothing really felt good. And with no how-to’s available to teenage me, I was left with my own imagination. I had heard of orgasms, I had tried to figure out what it could mean to me, but I was clueless about how to achieve one.
It all changed when I was eighteen. My then-boyfriend was an older, experienced lover who showed me what sex could be like. He made me reach my first orgasm and exposed me to my first sex toys. In a dingy store in the Red Light District in Amsterdam, we bought this expensive Tarzan-like vibrator. It had rotating beads in the shaft and a separate clitoris stimulator. It quickly became my new best friend.
The relationship with my boyfriend soon became troubled, but the vibrator was mine and stayed close to my bedside. Around the same time, I ordered online a hard plastic G-spot vibrator as well. Now I had two toys that could make me cum. Next up was a suction-cup vibrator that I enjoyed for having a totally different feel than the first two. I began to masturbate for various other reasons than mere sexual pleasure. I loved how it calmed me down, how it helped me to fall asleep. The toys made me feel good.
Twenty Years On
Today still vibrators make me feel good. They give me the chance to escape my own mind, to seek comfort in the world of my own fantasy. Even in my darkest days, my fifteen minutes alone with a sex toy bring me joy. When I saw the advert seven years ago to become a sex toy tester, I was immediately enthused. I wrote a review of my Hitachi-wand, they liked how I wrote, and the rest is history.
On average I masturbate twice a week with a vibrator, except for when I need to test toys, then it’s more. And I don’t only use them for masturbation. My husband loves to tease me with them during BDSM play or whatever make out session we’re having. Since they’re a constant companion in my life, I’m always looking for new models, new materials, new ideas.
Sex toys have brought me a lot: joy, relaxation, pleasure, distraction, stress relief. I don’t think we’ll ever fall out of love. Sex toys have enriched my life so much, we will always stay together.